Saturday, May 19, 2012

An Interactive Story: An Excerpt

I had nothing. Absolutely nothing.
I clutched the five cent coin she gave me years ago. I looked at it intently and stared at the heavens which seemed to connive with my sadness by pouring on what seemed like tears of angels who pitied me. I turned my gaze on the clear, gushing stream unperturbed by the impact of raindrops dead set on disturbing its flow.

I was wet, so were my books, phone and notes. It meant nothing to me now. No. There was nothing wrong with me. It was just that. It had to happen so soon. So soon. In the happiest time of my life. It had to happen. It was my fault.

I wished to turn back time. I wished I never moved here. Bright lights suddenly illuminated the water. A car must have pulled over.

"Found you, said Leo. He covered me in a raincoat and knelt in front of me. "Let's go before you catch a cold."

I was confused. Why was I here in the first place? This same spot. This five cent coin. The hollow log near the side of the river. The stones that were scattered in front of me. Liquid flowed in my cheeks. I wasn't sure whether it came from my eyes or the rain. Leo tried to lift me up, but I stayed planted on the ground. He doesn't understand the feeling... and I hope he would never get to experience it. I was pathetic, inconsiderate and furious at myself for being in this position... for being the unwanted burden of my best friend.

"You idiot, he said, managing a fake smile. Come on now, I know you've had a... pretty bad day."

Bad day? Such insensitive words. I'll let it slide for now. I stood up and threw the five cent coin at the stream. Leo let out a sigh of relief.

"Sorry bro, I said. She wouldn't want me.....

I tried to smile. I failed. My legs gave way. I sat on the ground, crying like a newborn. Leo didn't know what to do. He just stood there and mumbled "let it all out."

***
I stared at the bowl of soup in front of me. Chicken soup. It was for the soul they said. A towel was draped unto my shoulder. It was either damp with shower water or my tears. I couldn't eat. The feeling on my stomach rendered me unable to pick up the silver spoon lying in front of me. I'm a failure.

Eondrei stood with Leo at the door, bidding me and Lora goodbye. Chelsea was already in bed, which was a good thing. She needn't see me in this state.

"Eat, said Lora. I'll be in front of you."

For what? It didn't make any sense to me.

_______________________________________

Blogger's note:

If you get what happened to him, just write a comment and I'll respond ASAP!

If you wish to continue the story, also comment!

Part two will be written soon.

Thursday, May 17, 2012

Arrogance is a necessity

I'm better that this. I've been thinking about a lot of the problems I'm facing, and they didn't turn out to be problems at all! I over thought things that really don't deserve to take up one-half of my already malfunctioning biological memory card. It felt like I've gotten my arrogance and pride back. I have something a lot more in me than the sh*t I'm feeling. I don't need them. I don't need their approval. I only value the opinions if the people I look up to. I will now do things for myself, intrinsically.

 I've been working my ass off for a couple of years now, not because I wanted it, but because I wished to be recognized. That mentality is seriously twisted. I can't believe how stupid I was to seek approval from those who wished to possess what I have now. I was blinded when i strived to be in the same level just to seek praise. It's effed up. I have all of these but it wasn't enough.

I realized there's more to life than trying to get hold of a star while lying in the grass under the blanket of darkness while being illuminated by the moonlight. It's something that I would never reach. I didn't fail because i wasn't able to. I succeeded because I realized that it wasn't worth it anymore. I'm better than this. I finally know.

Wednesday, May 16, 2012

NBA Starter or the Young Journeyman?


I don't know where to start. Seriously.

This blog entry is about fans suggesting that Denver Nuggets' center Javale Pierre McGee (who happens to be a legitimate NBA starter) should NOT be our naturalized player (and the one who'll take Douthit's place) in favor of the PBA Commissioner's Cup Best Import 2012, Denzel Bowles.


This guy....


McGee vs Andrew Bynum


vs this guy...




Denzel Bowles vs Ali Peek


Should this even be debated? Let me get this straight, you want a journeyman who recently won a championship in the PBA (who failed to get drafted) over an NBA Slam Dunk contest runner-up, 18th overall draft pick and once again, a LEGITIMATE NBA STARTER? Weird. Seriously. Mind boggling. Mind effed.
If you were hoping to read a neutral entry from admin KP, you thought wrong. I just find this whole situation absurd. I'm not trying to escalate the issue here, I want to end it. I'm just frustrated at how  (sorry for the term) some "superfans" are. Bowles > McGee? Really? Really? Really?

On a serious note, I do understand why Bowles fans want him on the national team. Let's face it, the whole nation hates the Tropang Texters. They were rallying BMeg. They wanted to see Chot Reyes choke, and choke he did. BMeg won the championship in seven games behind the dominating performance of "Super Bowles". He overpowered the likes of Kelly Williams, Donell Harvey, Ali Peek, Harvey Carey and Ranidel de Ocampo! WOW.

Meanwhile, McGee's team lost to the Los Angeles Lakers in the 1st round of the NBA Western Conference playoffs. He tussled with the likes of Andrew Bynum and Pau Gasol. Here's a vid:




Nuff said. McGee FTW. It's not the fans who chose him over Bowles, it's the SBP's call.

So SMC fans (who are members of Team Bowles), if you want to do something helpful to the NT, cut the crap about Denzel. He's good, but not but not a perfect fit as McGee is. We really don't need another guy who can shoot the lights out at the perimeter, we need an intimidating presence inside. McGee's the guy for the job.

Oh yeah, and tell SMC to loan their players to the national team, rather than talking crap about a team who didn't attend the PBA All-Star Weekend because of playing all year long due to their commitment to the national team.

~KP  -_-

All photos belong to their respective owners.

Sunday, May 13, 2012

Gibberish

There are options... there are priorities.

As I'm encoding this entry, I'm enjoying the cold breeze brushing against the nape of my neck while trying to ignore the faint smell of chicken feces. The weather has taken a turn for the better. It's starting to rain and well, yeah, summer is over (thank God).

I kind of feel apathetic. Probably because of my Gilas 2 entry. I won't deny the fact that I was stupid enough to write something very personal and present it to a worldwide audience. Damage control mode is on.

I really don't care that much about everything anymore. Probably because of my mood or just my mindset or maybe I'm just so effing tired. I've never spent a whole day at home for like a month now. The two day excursion to the beach earlier this week wasn't enough. I need a proper vacation! I'm not getting any younger for Pete's sake!

Let's see what happens this week, although I'm not really looking forward to anything anymore.

Enough is enough. I keep telling myself that. I know I'm just an option, not a priority. Leaving now is a necessity, but I just can't because I'm lacking the capacity.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Gilas Pilipinas: An Obsession Part 2

These past few days, I've really been bothered by the inconsistencies regarding all the aspects of my life . It just came to thought that this will be my last summer vacation while being a student, as I am on verge of finishing my education with the hope that I will keep on learning. I've never been in a serious relationship before. Yes, I might be lame, but I spent the last three years getting dumped numerously and waiting to be given the opportunity. Oh yeah...   isang babae lang yan. I could have gone on looking for other girls, but no. I didn't have the capacity to.


Ang corny mo KP, cheezy pa.


What the hell am I writing? This is supposed to be about Gilas, not about my boring and rather ridiculously effed up life.

Anyway, moving on, after three years of being a Bachelor in Broadcasting student, I have learned that mass media chooses what to cover, censor and show to the public and that those materials will inevitably have a strong and direct influence on the masses. Check these communication theories: Agenda Setting, Gatekeeping and Hypodermic Needle. (Being a Broadcasting student really requires brains, a voice, writing ability and a face, which I have. JUST KIDDING)

In this regard, we all know that Smart Gilas Pilipinas National team had meager TV coverage. Print media was consistent in bringing up updates about them (kudos to writers Joey Villar, Cedelf Tupas and Jonas Terrado). However, TV was a totally different scenario. The team first signed up with GMA7.


lalalala


You know, that network that airs ridiculous fantaseryes which made me puke. After the contract signing, I heard nothing from GMA. Nothing. Zip. Nil. It was crazy. It's like having a parent's permit to a school activity signed and ending up not participating. It was crazy. They showed a series of documentaries. Really? Documentaries? Documentaries of Gilas fighting their hearts out against the giants of the middle east with out an import.  I remember that they had Ballesteros as their only legitimate center. He had to stand up to the likes of CJ Giles, Matt Freije and Joe Vogel. GMA also aired a Gilas' Australian tour. By the way, did I mention that they aired these months after the events concluded?

                                      

Preposterous.


Part three of this series will continue soon. Keep you posted =D



~KP

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Ripples

My life is just a drop in a bucket.

I just watched "Ripples", a japanese visual novel (translated to English). It just lasted a few minutes, but it really left a lasting message.

"Yes, life is just a drop of water in a bucket, but remember every drop leaves ripples."

It's downloadable at the Apple App Store.

Trust me, it's really worth it =D